How to be the Best Mother of the Bride or Groom:
Congratulations! Your son or daughter had just become engaged! This is such an exciting time for all mothers... But it can also be stressful, so be prepared. If you are a first time Mother of the Bride or Mother of the Groom, then here are a few tips for you. If you are an encore soon-to-be-mother-in-law, then you may also find these tips useful!
The first thing to remember is that this is your child’s wedding. It sounds very simple, yet many mothers tend to get carried away with their children’s weddings as if they were their own. The most probable reason for this, is that as a parent, you have probably been thinking about this special day since they were born. The most important thing for a mother is basically the general rule of motherhood: Just be there! In this day and age weddings are a lot more extravagant, expensive, stressful and much less traditional. There are many things you will find irrational and unnecessary for the wedding. Times are changing and this is the way it’s done now, and although you may want to freak out about how “absolutely necessary” it is to spend $1,000 on roses for the event, just do the old trick: Smile and nod! Keep in mind that weddings these days are also much less traditional. It is very acceptable not to be married in a church, not to wear high heels to the wedding, to incorporate colours or shades such as black into the theme of the event and to write ones own vows.
Mother of the Bride:
Your little girl is getting married and she will need all the support she can get! It is a nice idea to suggest to her that you would like to be there with her for such things as:
-Shopping for wedding dresses -Visiting florists, photographers, cake makers etc -Visiting venues for the wedding -Having a cup of tea (or glass of champagne!) and flicking through wedding magazines
If your daughter asks you for your opinion on anything, give her your honest opinion, but if you think she wont like your answer then it’s best to use constructive criticism. For example:
Your daughter is trying on wedding dresses. The loves one dress which doesn’t sit particularly right on her...
Daughter: Do you like the dress mum? Mum: It looks lovely. But I think that you should try on a few more before making your final decision. Why not take a look at this dress? (show dress) I think it would look beautiful on you!
...Instead of...
Daughter: Do you like the dress mum? Mum: No, it’s ghastly! You could do much better!
At this point in your daughter’s life she will really need her Mum. Be prepared for late night phone calls, strange behaviour, tears and laughter (at the same time!) and a lot of stress. A big cuddle and some reassurance that it will all be ok will make everything all better!
Mother of the Groom:
Just like the mother of the bride, you play a very important role in the whole wedding process! The wedding planning process is a wonderful chance for you to bond with your future daughter-in-law as well as see your son handles crazed, stressed women!
Just like the mother of the bride, it would be nice to ask your future daughter-in-law if you can be involved in the process with her. Showing interest in the wedding is a great indicator for the bride that you want to bond with her and are accepting her into your family.
Your son will more than likely feel utterly confused with the whole planning process and will be constantly wondering why his soon to be wife is laughing one second and crying the next. He will probably need a lot of reassurance from his Mum that women are not as crazy as they seem!
Just as the mother of the bride should realise, weddings have changed a lot in the past 5-10 years. Old traditions are slowly becoming obsolete and these days anything goes. If you have anything specific in your family traditions that you would like to see included in the wedding, express the importance of it to your son and then your soon to be daughter-in-law. It is important to express this early on in the planning process to give the betrothed time to consider and if necessary, plan it into the wedding.
Lovely Mothers, don’t forget that this should be an exciting time for you as well... try to relax and enjoy the process... However stressful it may be! Good luck!
The first thing to remember is that this is your child’s wedding. It sounds very simple, yet many mothers tend to get carried away with their children’s weddings as if they were their own. The most probable reason for this, is that as a parent, you have probably been thinking about this special day since they were born. The most important thing for a mother is basically the general rule of motherhood: Just be there! In this day and age weddings are a lot more extravagant, expensive, stressful and much less traditional. There are many things you will find irrational and unnecessary for the wedding. Times are changing and this is the way it’s done now, and although you may want to freak out about how “absolutely necessary” it is to spend $1,000 on roses for the event, just do the old trick: Smile and nod! Keep in mind that weddings these days are also much less traditional. It is very acceptable not to be married in a church, not to wear high heels to the wedding, to incorporate colours or shades such as black into the theme of the event and to write ones own vows.
Mother of the Bride:
Your little girl is getting married and she will need all the support she can get! It is a nice idea to suggest to her that you would like to be there with her for such things as:
-Shopping for wedding dresses -Visiting florists, photographers, cake makers etc -Visiting venues for the wedding -Having a cup of tea (or glass of champagne!) and flicking through wedding magazines
If your daughter asks you for your opinion on anything, give her your honest opinion, but if you think she wont like your answer then it’s best to use constructive criticism. For example:
Your daughter is trying on wedding dresses. The loves one dress which doesn’t sit particularly right on her...
Daughter: Do you like the dress mum? Mum: It looks lovely. But I think that you should try on a few more before making your final decision. Why not take a look at this dress? (show dress) I think it would look beautiful on you!
...Instead of...
Daughter: Do you like the dress mum? Mum: No, it’s ghastly! You could do much better!
At this point in your daughter’s life she will really need her Mum. Be prepared for late night phone calls, strange behaviour, tears and laughter (at the same time!) and a lot of stress. A big cuddle and some reassurance that it will all be ok will make everything all better!
Mother of the Groom:
Just like the mother of the bride, you play a very important role in the whole wedding process! The wedding planning process is a wonderful chance for you to bond with your future daughter-in-law as well as see your son handles crazed, stressed women!
Just like the mother of the bride, it would be nice to ask your future daughter-in-law if you can be involved in the process with her. Showing interest in the wedding is a great indicator for the bride that you want to bond with her and are accepting her into your family.
Your son will more than likely feel utterly confused with the whole planning process and will be constantly wondering why his soon to be wife is laughing one second and crying the next. He will probably need a lot of reassurance from his Mum that women are not as crazy as they seem!
Just as the mother of the bride should realise, weddings have changed a lot in the past 5-10 years. Old traditions are slowly becoming obsolete and these days anything goes. If you have anything specific in your family traditions that you would like to see included in the wedding, express the importance of it to your son and then your soon to be daughter-in-law. It is important to express this early on in the planning process to give the betrothed time to consider and if necessary, plan it into the wedding.
Lovely Mothers, don’t forget that this should be an exciting time for you as well... try to relax and enjoy the process... However stressful it may be! Good luck!